HOWLween! with the ESA Recap: Part Two
This is Part Two of our exciting HOWLween! with the ESA Recap. You can catch up on Kristinaville’s initial casualties here.
The two werewolves were still at large. Our town, on the other hand, was feeling not so large. Especially when we all woke up and discovered that Jessica, the nicest person in our whole town, had been murdered.
Also, ever since Kevin died, we had all been running short on carbs. Our energy levels just weren’t what they used to be.
*
‘What if we just don’t kill someone? What if I’m morally against killing?’ Ronnie asked, after leading three angry murder mobs.
‘No, you have to kill someone,’ said a ghost.
‘It’s the rules,’ we all agreed.
Sure enough, when we brought out our town charter, there it was, penned in the fine and overly elaborate cursive of any good legal document: Thou shalt fight murder with murder.
‘Oh, well, okay. In that case,’ Ronnie picked up his pitchfork, ‘I still don’t trust Odie.’
Dakota pointed out that they were killing every other person on the street. This was a really smart observation. But we were suspicious of smart people. Intellect seemed pretty supernatural. We killed her.
Turns out she was just a smart person.
Sure enough, when we brought out our town charter, there it was, penned in the fine and overly elaborate cursive of any good legal document:
Thou shalt fight murder with murder.
My house was now full of ghosts. It was really annoying. I kept walking through them and they kept getting mad at me for not respecting their personal space. Death makes you incredibly hypocritical.
‘Fine! I’ll go outside and give someone medical attention! Are you happy?’
They were not happy. They were dead.
I left my house. I walked around the block until I saw Vicky. She was lying in the bushes and covered in blood.
‘Hey. Hey Vicky. Are you asleep?’
‘Oh my god,’ The ghost of Danni floated by. ‘Are you serious?’
Vicky didn’t respond. I did not acknowledge Danni.
It was kind of hard to tell where Vicky was hurt. There was just a lot of blood. Also fur. But I patched her up as best I could and then went home. All the ghosts told me that I was the worst doctor ever.
*
Vicky showed up to the town meeting remarkably unbloody and unharmed. Helena was dead. I realized that I was a fool.
‘We should definitely kill Vicky,’ I said.
‘I don’t think we should do that. I don’t think I’m the werewolf.’ Vicky began. Then she coughed up a finger-bone.
We killed Vicky and felt good about doing something right for once.
*
That night, still trying to appease my 100 ghost roommates, I walked over to Ashley’s house. I threw a rock at her window.
‘Ashley? Hey, Ashley!’
Ashley drew the curtain and stared down at me. ‘What are you doing out at night? Are you trying to get yourself killed?’
‘No!’ I waved my doctor’s bag in the air. It had a nice red cross on it, so you knew that I was a real, certified doctor. ‘Are you being attacked by a werewolf? Do you need medical attention? Maybe a leech?’
‘What?’ said Ashley. ‘No. I’m doing a really good job of not getting killed. Go home!’
I turned to the ghost of Kristina and shrugged. ‘Well, I tried.’
And that’s when the werewolf killed me.
*
In retrospect, we should’ve known the last werewolf was Mackenzie. She slept in the hen house and was a little too into Frisbee. She also never talked. Only barked. But hindsight is twenty-twenty. At the time, Odie just seemed really suspicious.
Anyway, it’s not my fault. I’m a good doctor.
The ESA promises a safe and bloodless night of games on Friday, November 17 at our November Board Game Night! You also won’t to miss our annual event, The Garden Statuary Issue 7.1 Launch Party on November 30. We hope to see you soon.
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